The Spice Girls @ Cologne

Last night, Jim and I went to Cologne to see the Spice Girls at their only German concert in Cologne! I was actually dreading the night, because I never really liked the Spice Girls. Jim was really wanted to see them, so I got him the tickets as an early christmas present.

We went in the afternoon to have dinner at the Hard Rock Café before the concert. The Girls only got there 50 minutes too late, but a crazy guy was dancing in the audience in front of the stage and eventually he started stripping, so we had a good time anyway. In general, I have to say, the concert was a great deal better than I expected it to be, every spice girl did a solo bit. All but Posh Spice, who did a catwalk-walk.......... Looks like she realized that she can't sing! Thank god!



After the concert we drove to Oberhausen and stayed in a hotel there, so I could start shopping early in the morning:-) So, this morning we went for breakfast at Alex's and after that I got to chose two of my christmas presents (a handbag and shoes - a very successful morning from a female point of view!) Now we are home again... getting ready for christmas, the wedding and the big move next year! We'll be spending christmas at my mum and dad's - hoping that it'll be a quiet one. On the 27th and 28th all of our friends and family from overseas are flying in, which we are really looking forward to!

Everyone that I will not speak to within the next week:

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A WONDERFUL NEW YEAR!!!!

I hope I will hear from everyone soon or even see some of you!

Lots of love,
Frederike

HAPPY CHRISTMAS...

.... EVERYONE!!!

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1572458451

A new year - a new country...!!

For all of you I haven't spoken to yet: Jim and I are moving to England in February! Jim will get a degree in engineering, so we are moving to Bordon for 18 months.

We are now getting really excited, we have to say. It won't be long, because December is almost over with christmas and the wedding coming up and then in January we'll already be packing! Scary! Bordon is a rather small town in the south-west of London (green arrow). I have never been, and Jim says it's not a very nice place. We might go to look at it, when we are going back to England in January to pick our new car up.



The preparations for the wedding are going well. We are going to Lüneburg this weekend to sort the rest of the stuff out and for me to get my dress fitted for the last time and go to the hair dresser and get my hair cut and coloured again. On monday it is my parents silver wedding... A big day. At the moment, most of my family is ill, but I really hope that they will be better by monday, so they can enjoy their big day. The will have a small church ceremony and then we are going to the same restaurant, we are having our reception at, to have a great party. My parents really deserve to have a beautiful day.... They are the best parents in the world!

What a wonderful weekend:-)

I thought I let you all know how I was feeling on Friday after my first week back at work. It was nice to get back to the office and see my colleagues again. I missed the social aspect of being at work most, I think. It is the best feeling to have something to get up for in the morning.

On Wednesday my darling came back from Poland, finally! It was quite funny because he was on the motorway about the time I finished work so I got to overtake him... TWICE! Pulled in to a garage and then overtook him again. It was sooo good to see him again. That day the first snow fell around here as well. It didn't last though, and today it is actually quite warm again.

On Friday after work we went downtown to do a bit of shopping and to meet an old friend of mine for dinner. That was lovely. Jim and I were both quite tired, so not much going on with us Friday night. On Saturday, my friend Eva and her little Lennox came around to see us, which was wonderful! At night, we went out for a meal. We went to a restaurant here in Bielefeld which is in an old church. It is the most beautiful place and the food was fantastic. We want to make it our local now and go again on Monday morning for the breakfast buffet. Today, we haven't done much at all...... Just been to the NAAFI (the English supermarket) to get myself some cosmetics. Met a few people there and now we are sitting in our warm living room, listening to music and having a glass of wine. Jim will be cooking a nice sunday dinner in a bit and I will just chill and read a book.

Have a wonderful sunday night everyone and a good week! Take care:-)

First day back at work...

.... was quite good! I didn't feel sick and I didn't have a panic attack, which makes me so very, very happy! But I wanna give it at least this week, before I celebrate. I hope things stay well though! It would be so nice to be able to get back into life:-)

It is very hard to imagine what it is like to suffer from something like agoraphobia and panic disorder. I am not feeling sorry for myself, but I constantly used to feel like I had to throw up. I sometimes felt, like I couldn't say anything or I would have to run out of the room and to the toilet. The panic attacks are worse, but they come and go and usually only last between three and ten minutes. But when they came on I would have at least four or five of the following symptoms:
- racing heartbeat
- difficulty breathing, feeling as though you 'can't get enough air'
- terror that is almost paralyzing
- dizziness, lightheadedness or nausea
- trembling, sweating, shaking
- choking, chest pains
- hot flashes, or sudden chills
- tingling in fingers or toes ('pins and needles')
- fear that you're going to go crazy or are about to die

It is a horrible experience, but I am not writing this here for all of you to read, because I want you to feel sorry for me (even though you should...LOL), but because a lot of people are suffering from a panic disorder and don't find out for years and are forced to lead a normal life, because they just think they are crazy. Doctors never find anything wrong with them and people on the outside don't realise that something is wrong, because they can't - no one can see. It was the same with me. I tried to push myself everyday, because I wanted a normal life and I didn't have a clue how to tell the people around me, how bad I actually was. When an attack occurs, I actually thought I would die - which is nothing you wanna tell people when you're 25 years old.

Anyway, I thought about creating a website for young women about agoraphobia and panic disorder, to raise the awareness - but I am not sure where to start. So, I thought I start here, by telling my friends about the condition! I hope you don't mind... and if you do..... DON'T READ IT!

I also got a message of Jim earlier..... he might be back early! YEAH! What a wonderful week!

I also found a few new songs I absolutely love - check them out on YouTube - I posted a link on the left under "Music"!!

Take care everyone:-)

I am back, Baby...!!!!!

I spoke to my boss today and I will be going back to work on monday!!!!! YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!

I didn't tell you yet, but this summer I was diagnosed with Agoraphobia and a panic disorder. It was a shock, but I was also very relieved that I finally found out what was wrong and could start to work on getting better. For the last four years I suffered from a number of different symptoms, never knowing what was happening. I've been going to doctors all the time, but no one ever found anything wrong with me. I have been working on it quite hard while I was written off and I am now at a point at which I can go back to work, even though it will only be part time at the beginning. It still is a big step for me and I am nervous about it, but I mostly look forward to it!

A few days in Lüneburg

I just got back from visiting my parents in Lüneburg. It was my dad's 50th birthday and now he is OLD - but he looks as good as ever! I am very proud of my parents and I love them very much and it is nice every time I see them.


I also got lots of stuff done for the wedding and got my dress fitted! GOD, I LOVE IT! I wish I could upload a picture for you to see, but then Jim would see it too, and I want it to be a surprise for him! He won't see it until I walk down the aisle towards him - I hope he will cry, but he already told me he wouldn't - apparently, he is too much of a man....:-) Ha ha - he's such a sweetie. He is still in Poland and doesn't have a very good time, as you can imagine. I feel so sorry for him, but it is only 10 more nights to sleep until he will come back!!!! I can't wait.

All about me...

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? Ken Follet - Triple
WHAT TIME IS IT NOW? 12:15 p.m.
FAVOURITE BOARD GAME? mhm...... pictionary, because Eva and I always beat Olaf and Jim **lol**
FAVOURITE MAGAZINE? Emotion (a german psychological magazine)
BABIES? not yet, but I can see two in the future, putting their fingerprints all over the car windows;-)
FAVOURITE SMELL? The fresh air first thing in the morning
WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? When Jim leaves to go on exercise or tour again
FIRST THING YOU THINK OF IN THE MORNING? "What day is today? Can I go back to sleep?"
HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? Not many, or the answer machine gets it.
FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? Girl: Rowan, Leyla, Hope... Boy: Not sure, but definitly NOT Zeus or Jim Jr. as Jim wishes
FAVOURITE COLOUR? Pink
WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN YOUR LIFE? My family and friends, being with my darling James
FAVOURITE FOOD! Pasta. When Jim is away I don't eat anything but Pasta for weeks!
IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I used to play the piano, but gave it up when it started to be uncool with about 14. Wish I would have carried on now!
DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? Hell yeah, I own the left side of the German "Autobahn"!
WHAT TYPE WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? Toyota Yaris
WHO IS THE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO? Anna... there was so much I wanted to say to her when she died, but I know that one day, I will be able to talk to her again, as well as to my grandfathers and I am looking forward to that day, even though I hope it won't be soon...
FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? Sex on the beach
WHAT'S IN THE BOOT OF YOUR CAR? A blanket, two first aid kits, which are both out of date, a warning triangle, some leisure trousers I got for Jim yesterday and couldn't be bothered to bring up yet, a broken umbrella, a plastic bag and probably some sort of Jacket or shoes.
DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? I have to or Jim gets upset;-)
IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT BE? I want to be a personal coach
EVER BEEN IN LOVE? Yes, and I still am and I hope I always will be - because it is the best feeling in the world!
GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? At the moment, it is half empty most of the time
FAVOURITE MOVIE? The one film I could watch over and over again is "Dirty Dancing" and every time I watch it I want to register for dancing lessons - Jim desperately needs them. And I wanna loose weight, so Jim can lift me up over his head..... right....
DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS? No, never
WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? I hope nothing.... unless my bunny found a way to get in there again!
WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST AMBITION? To make my family happy as often as I can.
WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST WEAKNESS? Fear
IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE ANYWHERE WHERE WOULD IT BE? At the baltic sea
WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? Polo shirt
BEACH, MOUNTAINS OR CITY? Beach
TECHNOLOGY OR ART? Technology, I think
COMEDY OR HORROR? definitly comedy
FAVOURITE PHYSICAL FEATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX? The behind
FAVOURITE TIME OF DAY? Sunday morning 6 a.m., cuddled up in bed knowing I can stay there for another few hours with Jim next to me...
THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT? Kayne West - Graduation
WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT, STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY? Strong in mind....
WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? Usually about 7 a.m.
WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE KITCHEN ITEM? My waffle maker!!!!!
WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY? People that can't drive
WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR OR SUV? mhm.... that is difficult, because I like big cars, but I also like fast cars.....
DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE? Very much so
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SEASON? Autumn
DO YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT? No, I am too much of a girl... but I always wanted a butterfly low on my back
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE DAY? Saturday, so much to do, so many people to see
WHICH DO YOU PREFER SUSHI OR HAMBURGER? Hamburger
IF YOU COULD TAKE A VACATION ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD WHERE WOULD IT BE? Dubai and Quatar - to see where my darling grew up!

Recommendation

I would like to recommend a book to all of you who speak German (or French) - the book doesn't seem to be available in English yet.

Das Buch handelt von Hector, einem Psychiater, der das Gefühl hat, dass er seine Patienten nicht wirklich glücklich machen kann. Er begibt sich auf eine Reise durch die Welt um nach dem Geheimnis des Glücklichseins zu forschen. Das Buch ist sehr einfach geschrieben und dementsprechen einfach zu lesen. Es ist trotzdem interessant und sehr passend. Ich empfehle es als leichte Lektüre an einem Sonntag Nachmittag!

He's off again...

I am back! Jim got back from his course in England in the middle of September. He was on leave for two weeks after that. We went to Lüneburg for my birthday and saw some friends of mine, which was wonderful. We also spent a day in Hamburg, which was great. Other than that, we went to IKEA three times within three days, and when we put everything up on the fourth day, we realized we still needed some pictures frames and so on, but both of us just couldn't be bothered to go back again.... We were sick of eating Hot Dogs!

After that Jim had to go back to work and he was on overtime the last two weeks, so we didn't see that much of each other. Now he is gone again, spending four freezing cold weeks on the back of a truck in Poland! Last time he was there on exercise most of his posessions were stolen..... So much for the prejudices!
We are still planning the wedding, and there still is a lot to do. But more and more people say they are coming, which is wonderful. We are really excited and are looking forward to spending a wonderful day with so many of our friends and our family.


Before that though we will be going to Cologne to see the SPICE GIRLS!!! Jim really wants to go and see them, so I got him tickets for christmas. I wanted it to be a surprise, but after he had such a hard week last week, I gave him the tickets already. That way, he also has something to look forward to, while he is freezing in Poland:-) But that is not everything: because I love him so much, I also got him a Hamster...... Jim couldn't think of a name, so I started calling it FREAK, because it has two red eyes, but one is rather pink, so it freaks me out! Jim called it Stella after his favorite beer. So now, I am on my own with GB and Stella aka FREAK!

This year II

After I was too tired to write anymore last night, I will try to catch up now.

What else happened this year... First of all, Jim was posted to Gütersloh after almost four years in Paderborn. A little later we moved into an Army quarter in Bielefeld-Ummeln. Sounds great, doesn't it? Bielefeld itself is a lot bigger than Paderborn, which made shopping more interesting, but that was about it:-) The flat we are living in is nice and bigger than our old one, the area is rather rural, which is a nice change as well, since we can go for bike rides and out for runs (yeah right!). Only a week after we moved, I started to work in Minden, which is about 65 km away from here. That meant I have to drive an hour each way, which made my workday quite long. I had to get used to it, and it made it difficult to meet new people in Bielefeld. So we still don't feel very home here yet.

Heard a nice saying considering Bielefeld from a friend today (it's German and difficult to translate, without losing its meaning):
Gott erschuf in seinem Zorn, Bielefeld und Paderborn.

Last year in July we got a new bunny, after the old one passed away on June 6th, 2006. Our new bunny is called GB, which stands for Gorgeous Bunny (NOT Great Britain). GB is black and white with floppy ears, while Chula was brown and grey. Both are our little shitbags...:-)





What we missed most in Paderborn was a balcony, which we have now. It is tiny, but both of us can sit on it and have a bbq. First time we had a bbq on it, we cracked a window.... We just heard a loud bang and when we looked the window at the side of the balcony was cracked - not nice - but funny.

Then, Jim and I went to Travemünde at the Baltic Sea at the end of April. It was about 30° C in Bielefeld and about 10° C up there. Still, the sun was shining and we had a wonderful day. We went on a boat trip and walked in the sea, which was freezing. We unfortunately had to go straight back the next day, but we can't wait to go again!



Now, I have to concentrate on watching TV... Jim is on a course in England at the moment. Eight more nights to sleep and my darling will be back with me! I will write more over the weekend and hope to hear from everyone who is reading this!

This year

For those of my friends that I haven't spoken to in a while, I will give a quick update of what has happened in the last year, or years respectively:

First, Jim and I got married on December 31st, 2006. I got fireworks on my wedding day at last (and I didn't have to pay for them either). I wandted a special date and since I never really liked New Years' Eve, because my expectations were never met, it was a great chance to turn the day into something special for the rest of my life. We got married at the Heinrich-Heine-Haus in Lüneburg (registry office) with our family and witnesses present. At night, we had a party with our family and best friends to celebrate.
Following the wedding at the registry office, we will have a white wedding on December 29th of this year. It will take place at the St. Michaelis-Church of Lüneburg. I can't wait - now that a lot of people have told us that they will spend the day with us, we are getting really excited and start to look forward to the party. I've got an appointment at a bridal shop next tuesday to look at and try on dresses.

It was about time... if you know what I mean.

I've been wanting to blog for ages and I somehow seem to remember that I created a blog somewhere ages ago. Wouldn't know where and when and how, so here we have got my second and hopefully more enduring and more successful try. My dear friend Nina advised me to use my time and start to blog as she did - THANK YOU NINA!

I never really had the time to think about things.. Nevermind write everything down to share it with all of my friends and people that care. My life has taken a sudden turn, which leaves me some time to do exactly that. So here we go: Watch out - I am sharing my thoughts on the world!